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writing a story...

>> Monday, August 07, 2006

one thing i am enjoying about my work is that i get to pay for my cellphone bill. i don't have to care much about maintaining a low balance, becuase i am now responsible for my text messages. but i still try to prevent myself from texting too much, or else my salary will be exhausted just for text messages.

paying for bills (electricity, telephone and water) makes me feel like i'm really an adult. but of course, there's still this overwhelming feeling that i'm actually earning something. before i go to sleep, i always look back at what i have done for the past 20 years. sure, there are a lot of days where i felt that i should've done better or didn't go lazy. but i'm contented with what i have right now. who would've thought that a 7-year old kid with a writing dream would actually make it come true? it was all one step at a time, one year at a time, one word at a time.

when i was a kid, my purpose for becoming a writer for children is because i didn't want to read the thick books without pictures. people shouldn't read the boring books because they don't help the reader in creating a scenery. small fonts in small pocketbooks were boring. i wanted books with large and colorful pictures, vibrant illustrations that speaks of the story. that's what i wanted to do.

i didn't know that i would take a course in creative writing. medicine was the ultimate bribe in my mother's side, while law was on my father's side. i only kept both sides quiet by saying that i could shift to a pre-med course once i entered a good school, or creative writing is a pre-law course. 4 years passed, and the little yumi has graduated from college. my, time does fly fast.

graduation came and they still counted on me. there was a 1% option for me to take a career in the medical field (they said i was still too young to work), and a 0.098561238764% chance of going into law school. besides, i didn't take the entrance test in any of the law schools so i didn't count on that. the bribe for medicine grew and grew, from a car, full tuition fee, ipod, laptop, books, shopping, board and lodging, allowance, etc etc. cool offer huh? i didn't know if i would bear all the medical terms. but if ever i became i doctor, i would still choose pediatrics, not dermatology as my tito would like me to be.

so what to do with my idle time at home? i went online and searched for writing jobs. at first, i just kept on sending resumes with job descriptions concerning writing. i imagined myself in those positions and thought, would i be happy with that job? it'll be a big check because it's in the advertising world, but was that what i really wanted? i still had that childish dream in me, to work with children. i gave myself a deadline. if i don't get a job by july, i'm going to study preschool education in up. that was it. but i still wanted to write.

i went to interviews, hating every single moment because i didn't want the jobs. i was despearate for jobs but i didn't want those i was getting into.

i got two calls from two offices. one had a job description of an english writer for children. the other was a creative writing teacher for children. cool. after the interviews, i began to yearn for the two jobs. i wanted both.

weeks came, and God answered my prayers. i am now in a job that i love (though stressful because of deadlines). both are afterschool programs for children. i accepted the writing job because they called first. i got accepted also in the teaching job, only after 2 weeks that i signed the contract with galileo. sayang, teaching kids how to write seems like a cool offer. ow well, i told them that i could come back after a year and do a part time job.

anyway, back to responsibilities. now that i'm working and earning something, i realized that work is not about salary. even if i get a high-paying job, but not like what i am doing, then that check is not enjoyable. i enjoy every single penny in my bank account, because this is what i am enjoying. i may say that this is not my dream job, but i am sure that i am meeting the minimum expectations i have set for myself. i don't care if all my salary is spent on paying the bills at home, or is used in filling my stomach with all the starbucks in the metro. i have received so much that i want to give back. not an obligation, but as a gesture of gratitude.

and who would ever believe that i would be actually earning something??????

(no cares to the world if this post didn't make any sense or didn't have any coherence. ahahahaha.)


Edz 6:47 PM  

see, that's what I've been trying to tell you about law school and quitting. iba talaga kung mahal mo ung ginagawa mo. if you don't love what you're doing, you don't get that gratifying feeling that you say you get from working with Galileo. At kung ikaw nga, di ka talaga pumasok at all sa med school or law school, at ayaw mong pumasok. Ano pa kaya kung nalaman mo na kung pano talaga un, at narealize mo na di un ang gusto mong gawin sa buhay mo. You say you love having a job that you love and enjoy. Well, the rest of us also want and have a right to the same kind of happiness that you found...just so happens we made a mistake on the way to searching for that thing that will make us as happy as you are right now :)

La lang. hehe just defending myself :)

yawmee 9:15 AM  

but you took a test in law. that means you considered yourself as a lawyer. :) now you're in that path, why not continue it?

Edz 9:30 AM  

for the simple reason that humans are humans, and they make wrong decisions a lot of times in their lives. and life isn't just one clear-cut, straight-line path :) some people end up having to go through detours before they find their way to the path they were really supposed to take. What if you found yourself taking a job that you just hated, like a...bank job. Wouldn't you someday decide to get out of it and find a job that would make you happier? Or would you just stick with it because you'd already chosen it? What's the point of having a choice if you can't use it to rectify mistakes, right?

Ano, magpapaka-philo tayo dito? LOL

yawmee 9:33 AM  

but you can't just run away from your problem, you have to face it!

KAYA MO YAN EDLYN! it's dictated on my friendster that you will be a lawyer.

Edz 7:05 PM  

quitting isn't necessarily running away from the problem. facing the problem doesn't necessarily mean that you have to stick to the cause of the problem. sometimes it means simply facing the fact that it HAS become a problem and making the decision to resolve that problem and leave. sometimes, it takes so much more guts to leave, knowing that you can't be certain of what else is there, than to stay, when you know full well it isn't for you, just because it's what everyone expects you to do.

there are different levels of "kaya". tignan mo ung genius ng ateneo..."kaya" nga niya...pero in the end, he left....:)

wala, di kita titigilan until I've somehow made u understand it from my point of view :P

yawmee 9:49 PM  

oh i understand you, di rin kita titigilan until you become a lawyer. ahahahahhaha

Edz 8:35 AM  

ahahaha if i quit, wala ka nang magagawa. once you quit, you can't go back :D

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